We’d Watch These

A sampling of television programs Steve and Jen are looking forward to in the coming season:

Arc of My Heart: A teen historical romance following Joan of Arc and her high school class as they discover love and fight the English.

Ep 01: “Pilot.” In 1428, Joan and her classmates enter their junior year at Orleans High, home of the Fighting Maids. Joan has no plans to marry, as she is saving herself to be a magical paladin-bride to Jesus, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t interested in the latest dresses and helping her friends Margaret and Catherine catch husbands! Margaret has her eye on the Archangel Michael, who is secretly the bastard half-brother of Louis, Duke of Orleans, but he’s been promised to Tiffany, the mean blonde handmaiden of the Duchess. Can the ladies finish their alchemy homework before English bowmen attack?

Ep 04: “The Rose.” Joan’s encounter with the handsome garrison commander has her questioning the value of holy virginity. Handmaiden Tiffany is with child, possibly by the mad Headmaster Charles VI, freeing Michael to court Margaret, but Joan has a vision and is forced to decide whether to tell them that their romance could doom all of France. There is a mystery beast from the forest terrorizing the teachers’ lounge.

Ep 10: “Redder Than Blood.” Now secretly wed to the Dauphin, Joan travels to Burgundy with Catherine and Michael’s half-angel infant daughter in a desperate bid to raise troops. Michael continues building Joan’s +2 Armor of Siege-Lifting in shop class, but runs into trouble when mad Headmaster Charles VI starts asking too many questions. The mystery beast from the forest turns out to be a friendly highwayman who teaches the handmaidens a very special lesson about disability and Christmas, which may have been inside them all along. (Guest star: Aldis Hodge)

*****

Mercutio and the Nurse: He’s one of the finest blades in Verona, she’s a foul-mouthed dry nurse. Together, they fight crime.

Ep 01: “Pilot.” Friar Laurence goes missing. Notes are delivered to Capulet and Montague that they must each produce 1,000 ducats, and deliver them together, or the friar will be killed. Capulet and Montague, though both fond of Laurence, will not cooperate. Can Mercutio and the Nurse find the kidnapper in time?

Ep 02: “Too Too Flimsy Evidence.” A mysterious stranger comes to town and reveals himself to be a prince. Mercutio and the Nurse must accompany him to Denmark to solve the mystery of his father’s murder, lest he take the law into his own hands, with dire consequences for all.

Ep 09: “When In Florence.” Mercutio and the Nurse receive an urgent message from their friends Leo and Nick, who have been accused of fomenting rebellion against Pope Alexander VI. Can their innocence be proved? (crossover)

*****

Leo and Nick: In this screwball comedy set in Renaissance Italy, Leonardo da Vinci is an expert on everything except politics, and Niccolo Machiavelli is a political fixer. Along with papal spy Lucrezia Borgia and her well-meaning but bumbling brother Cesare, what will they get up to next?

Ep 01: “Pilot.” Leo and Nick decide that the best way to give Florence access to the sea is to reroute the Arno River. Everything is going fine until Cesare Borgia shows up to help. Hijinks ensue.  Meanwhile, Lucrezia searches the papal residence for a “B” plot.

Ep 02: “Been Weighting Long Enough.” When Leo invents an anti-gravity device, Cesare Borgia accidentally flies off in it. Nick has to keep the secret from his girlfriend Lucrezia until Leo can find a way to get him back.

Ep 10: “Questionable Taste.” Leo invents a time machine, and he and Nick travel to the New World in the 21st Century. In a place called Louisiana, they meet a Moor who is surrounded by vampires. Charmed by his jambalaya and his strangely enjoyable smoke, they decide to save him. (crossover)

*****

True Weed: In this “True Blood” spinoff, Lafayette cooks and deals his way from one side of the country to the other, helping those in need with his wisdom and outstanding stash.

Ep 01: “Pilot.” While passing through Austin, Texas, Lafayette meets a group of hipsters who plan to steal his dope. He is warned by Byron, a handsome stranger in cowboy boots. Lafayette must hang onto his weed while teaching them about fair play and how to cook crayfish.

Ep 2: “And Vine.” Lafayette and his new sidekick Byron reach Hollywood and run into a bunch of studio executives. This is his chance to convince them to make the “Black Widow” movie we’ve all been dreaming of. His pot is good, but is it good enough? (Guest star: Scarlett Johansson)

Ep 11: “Hearts and Minds.” Lafayette and Byron arrive in New York City. A famous TV personality is on a campaign to tighten drug laws. Lafayette goes on his show and wins his heart with his famous Cajunburgers. But he’s put something extra into the dessert. Will it be enough to change the TV personality’s mind? Meanwhile, Byron insists they visit Times Square for reasons of his own. (Guest star: Larry King)

*****

Sons of Piety: This steamy crime drama features Pilgrims as you’ve never seen them before. Through witch trials, gang wars, and international ergotphetamine smuggling deals, one family will learn that loyalty and progress are the most important values.

Ep 01: “Upon This Plymouth Rock.” Goody and Goodman Teller rule crime in the north side of Plymouth Rock, from manufacture of forbidden Catholic dispensations to black market trade in maize and flax. The family’s daughters Elizabeth and Abigail have just invented eyeliner, and combined with their boredom from being confined to narrow-minded gender roles, trouble is brewing and bubbling double-time.

Ep 02: “The Trial.” The girls have accused their mother Tara of witchcraft, along with Wendy the Cook. The town tattoo artist is accused of slipping the devil’s mark into tattoos. Plymouth Rock might be shattered by the accusations, especially when famous traveling barrister Alan Shoreman comes to defend them. (Guest star: James Spader)

Ep 10: “New Kids on the Block.” When five handsome Quakers arrive with a musical message of peace and love, they’ve got it–the right stuff, that is. Many of Jax’s foot soldiers start hangin’ tough with the Friends. Worse, Jax suspects Goody Tara of having pantsfeelings for their leader Jonathan. Does she want to be his girl? Will the fight get bloody, or will Jonathan talk Jax into a dance-off? (Guest stars: Donny Wahlberg, Jonathan Knight)

Baltimore, The Nation, The Wire

Following a link on Making Light, I just read this piece from The Nation. It brings up a number of interesting questions about police violence, about art in general and The Wire in particular, and about The Nation.

Before I get into what I think is the main point of the essay I want to discuss something that appears early in the article. Dave Zirin, the author of the essay, is speaking of how Baltimore residents he knows feel about The Wire, and relates being told that, “living in Baltimore was a struggle and the idea of anyone making commerce out of their pain was simply not their idea of entertainment.”

This is a very telling remark. It relates closely to much that I’ve heard about “cultural appropriation.” Let us perform a thought experiment: take “commerce” out of the sentence I quoted above and replace it with “art.” At this point, it seems to me that any reasonable person would have an attitude something like, “Well, that depends how good and how honest the art is.” It now becomes clear that the issue is commerce. We are all aware of the multi-billion-dollar entertainment industry, and the idea of human misery being exploited to increase their profits naturally turns our stomachs. But there is the corporation, and there is the writer; the conglomerate and the artist. They work together, they are in conflict, they need each other, they battle each other. So long as we live in a capitalist society, artists cannot, in general, create their art unless they are paid for it (to be sure, there are exceptions, but none of these exceptions are on major television networks).

My point is this: artistic problems with depictions of exploitation in art are about honesty, integrity, sensitivity, and technique: how effectively are you telling the truth? Moral problems with depictions of exploitation in art are a problem of capitalism. If you remove the profit motive  you also remove the moral issue.  Of course, it needs to be stated  that the only way to remove the profit motive is to destroy capitalism, which would likewise remove any reason for those conditions to exist in the first place.  I hope we can all agree that the existence of poverty and oppression is a far bigger problem than if and how it is depicted! Those who object loudest to “cultural appropriation” are those who accept capitalism as permanent, and thus consider the inhuman conditions caused by capitalism to be unalterable.

Let’s move on.  The thrust of the article is that there are two flaws in the TV show The Wire that seriously undermine its value in the eyes of Mr. Zirin: that it understates the level of police violence, and that its central focus is on how individuals are crushed by systems while it ignores “grassroots organizations who have, in a state of MSM invisibility, been building movements for years to fight poverty, end street violence, and challenge police brutality.”  Let us consider the first of these points.

In the article, Mr. Zirin observes that the police in Baltimore are, in fact, far worse than depicted on The Wire. I’m glad to know Mr. Zirin is finally aware of this, though it makes me wonder just where he’s been hiding until now. And yet, the central issue is this: a major television show depicted police violence, not as an aberration, but as part of a system. And did so with good writing, sympathetic characters (brilliantly played by some amazing actors), and genuine heart. Certainly, it would have been better if it had been more honest–if the innate viciousness inherent in the need to constantly terrorize and oppress those who have been discarded by capitalism had been even more highlighted. But there is no understanding of history or art without context, and a critical evaluation of The Wire needs to begin, in my opinion, by recognizing that this is the first time there has appeared on US television a program showing the police that didn’t simply assume they–or, at any rate, the majority of them–were heroes whom all ought to respect and admire, even if there is, here and there, a “bad apple.”

But the second point is more significant, and cuts to the heart of the matter.  In speaking of his “grassroots organizations” he says, “But when bureaucracies battle social movements, the results can be quite different.” At this point, I want to ask the author just what movements he has in mind and what those movements have accomplished lately? If these social movements are doing so well, Mr. Zirin, what led to the explosion of protests–some of them violent–that caused your epiphany?

“Why were those fighting for a better Baltimore invisible to David Simon? …those fighting for their own liberation? Why was The Wire big on failed saviors and short on those trying to save themselves?”

It is valid to ask that of Mr. Simon, and in my opinion the answer has to do with his own limitations: he cannot see beyond  capitalism, and thus can see no way forward for the “human refuse” capitalism produces.  In my opinion, it is very much to his credit that he shows them, and shows them as human beings, rather than stereotypes.

But I would also like to address the same question to Mr. Zirin.  Why have there been no effective mass movements against police violence, unemployment, grinding poverty?  When he refers to “social movements” it is vague.  And that is exactly the point.  He seems to be speaking of some sort of, “people getting together to do something,” without a particular purpose, direction, program. This is important: what first brings people together in opposition to cruelty and injustice might be anger, desperation, the desire for justice.  But those feelings, powerful as they are, never last beyond the short-term.  What holds a movement together long enough to accomplish change is it’s program; and when there is no program, there is nothing to hold a movement together.  Under those conditions, what does the movement do?  Sometimes it dissipates into apathy.  Sometimes it explodes into justified but unproductive violence.  Sometimes it is swallowed up by an organization that can make the right-sounding noises and actually has a program in place–such as the Democratic Party.

There have been many such movements in the past, and they have all led to the same place: back into the safe, non-threatening waters of the two major parties of big business.    Why have there been no effective movements of the oppressed in recent years?  The answer to that question is: so far, those “fighting for their own salvation” have been stuck in protest politics and identity politics and efforts to pressure the Democratic Party. It is no accident that this essay appears in The Nation–a magazine that epitomizes exactly that: the drive to harness and control the legitimate outrage of the most conscious elements of the oppressed and divert it harmlessly into the left wing of the Democratic Party. That is exactly The Nation’s agenda. And the results? Is Mr. Zirin aware that Baltimore is controlled by Democratic Party politicians? That the mayor is African-American?  That more than 40% of the Baltimore police force is African American, including the Commissioner and the Deputy Commissioner? That is the result of his “social movements.” How has that worked out for you, Baltimore?

Here the ultimate cynicism of this essay is revealed: He asks why “social movements” are ignored by The Wire. The answer is because they have had no effect, and that is because, hitherto, these movements have been led into a dead end because of exactly the sort of politics Mr. Zirin is advocating: the empty, formless, content-free “social movement.”  And, like all pseduo-left radicals, the working class–the one force in contemporary society that is actually capable of effectively fighting the attacks of capital–appears nowhere in his essay or his perspective.  Like all of those who are frightened for their middle-class positions, nothing terrifies him as much as a working class that is fighting independently of the capitalist parties.   Today as the working class is becoming more angry by the day, and are showing signs of beginning to organize, the desperation of forces like Zirin and The Nation to do anything, anything to keep the rage of the oppressed safely confined within capitalist channels becomes almost palpable.

The problems of Baltimore–of police violence–will not be solved by “social movements” in the abstract–but by united action of the working class and the oppressed following a program that rejects the two parties of big business. The oppressed have no way forward today except by organizing and uniting under a socialist program. And among those who have to be fought are those who would lie and mislead us, with The Nation at the top of that list.

Oh, Look! A New Presidential Bid!

Educator Jane Smith announced her candidacy  for president on Wednesday, making her the latest to seek the Democratic Party nomination.  In a well-attended speech delivered at Antioch College, where she is the chair of the Alternate History department, she stated that as President, her primary focus would be on a more even distribution of wealth among the top 5%. In her speech, she promised to carry on a fight for greater equality among those who benefit from war and poverty.  “We, as a nation, do an outstanding job of slaughtering civilians for oil profits, and yet who gets those profits? A tiny clique of people that includes very few tenured educators.”

“It is unfair,” she went on to say, “and in conflict with all of the values of our great nation, that only the privileged few reap the benefits of our brutal exploitation of the poor and the working class.”

In the question period that followed, she was asked about her position on the militarization of the police, and the police killings of poor, primarily African-American youths. “Well of course,” she said, “it is important to have a strong police force to make certain those we are draining money from are too frightened to do anything about it, but the important question is, when we drain that money, who gets it? It is outrageous that so many of the wealthy are asked to support police murder while gaining only a tiny fraction of what is available to be raked up.”

She pointed out that, of those who are becoming rich off the Detroit bankruptcy, nearly all of them are white and male. “What is the point of cutting off water for tens of thousands of people if the profits are not evenly divided among all of the elite?”

“If elected,” she concluded, “I will see to it that everyone ground into the dirt by the profit system will have the satisfaction of knowing his or her sacrifice benefits all of the wealthy equally.”

One sentence worldbuilding contest results

Wow.  Jesus.  That was hard.  First, I went through all the entries looking for two things: 1) Do I really love it, and 2) Is this the best or only entry from this person.  That got me down to 35 entries.  I want to say, at this point, that there are a lot of entries that didn’t make this cut that make me really, really, want to read the story, and that all of the entries from here on did.

The next phase was hard: I asked my self how much did I want to read the story, plus how well did it imply things about the world?  I sorted these into, “Oh, fuck yes,” and, “almost oh, fuck yes.”  There ended up being 19 “Oh, fuck yes” entries.

I got it down to 15, then glared at the spreadsheet and realized I had to change the rules a bit.  There will be 5 honorable mentions, 5 runners-up, and 5 winners.  All of these are listed in the semi-random order my spreadsheet put them in.

Here are the honorable mentions:

  • Experimental Error:The very last issue of the Journal of Artificial Intelligence ran an editorial that considered whether robots were sentient and if so, whether they were capable of understanding that we were, too.”
  • Chris Wallace:I bought my watch because it was self-winding, purely mechanical, and had no electrical parts, which is why I still love it and why it’s the only thing that still works.”
  • Stevie:I have always wondered if we woke her, with our shaft drillers and our tunnel borers, or whether, instead, it was the natural rhythm of her life to sleep and wake, and this was just her time; she has never answered me, and longevity is seldom the fate of those who presume too far on the patience of a god.”
  • Jsimon:The dog-spirit nipped playfully at my toes, which made me realize I’d already drifted some distance from my body.”
  • evergreen:I woke up when the subway pulled into the Haight Street station and the police got on to ask the riders to show their bar codes.”

Here are the runners up:

  • Pamela Dean: “All the trees and goblins had run off the vases again, so that Daisy was furious and the Queen, as threatened, fell into the most annoying sort of decline.”
  • mandrake:The Cloud was full of lunatic scientists, leaders, and the occasional Pope, but the first of the Uploaded to remain sane turned out to be a twelve-year-old-girl with terminal cancer and an excessive love of Hello Kitty.”
  • Private Iron:I have no time to tell stories, but my dim-witted friend here keeps copious notes, some of which are highly incriminating and all of which are heresy.”
  • Star Straf:Every morning I wake to fresh scars that my body double earned in the war.”
  • Nils Weinander:On a cold September morning, an exiled angel lay on a roof above a backstreet in Norrmalm, Stockholm, watching two garbage collectors pulling back in horror as they found a mutilated body behind a container.”

And, finally, the winners.  Five of them, all of whom will receive autographed copies of the next Incrementalist novel:

  • bckinney:The legionnaires drove the sandgrouse from the oasis, and the spirits from their shrines, but they could not quiet the ghosts on the salt-flat wind.”
  • Jo Walton:Grandma always told me if things got bad to look for a Carthaginian ship, and now, with cops from seven planets on my tail and the High Priest of Baal so close he was practically tying knots in it, I took a glide around the port trying to look as if I was taking an idle interest in spidersilk and shadesong instead of weighing up whether I was desperate enough to take her advice.”
  • chaos:The murder charge didn’t stick because I’d backed him up first, but that left me on the hook for neuroprivacy invasion and the HIPAA violations that go with that, not to mention old-fashioned assault and battery.”
  • Cpaca:It was a simple mistake – they told me it was Wednesday, so I figured the Norse Gods had won here.”
  • Barbara Robson:In 9,998 out of 10,000 parallel worlds, I am madly, passionately in love with you, you bastard.”

There.  Congratulations!

And, everyone who entered: Please write those stories!  I want to read them!

Contest: Quick Update

Sorry I’ve taken so long to get to this.  I’ve a new project that is demanding all of my attention–it really wants to be written right now, and my opinion on the matter doesn’t interest it.  But I plan to get to this SOON.  The amazing Jenphalian is helping me with it, so that should be encouraging.  Meanwhile, thanks for your patience.