Category: Texas Wisdom

“There’s lots of parables about a poor man learning to be content to be poor.  That’s cuz most of ’em were made up by rich folk who were content to be rich.”

— Billy-Bob Gautama

A great zen teacher came up to Billy-Bob Gautama and said, “I know that today is your birthday, thus I intend to give you a gift.  I give you greatest gift there is: nothing.”  Billy-Bob said, “And the greatest state of the mind is thoughtlessness,” then he hit the teacher over the head with the short staff named Hank.  “Thank you,” said the teacher, having thus received enlightenment.

“Care for your truck as if it’ll last a hundred years.  Drive it as if it’ll break down tomorrow.”

— Billy-Bob Gautama

“The journey is the destination.  As long as you ain’t goin’ nowheres in particular.”

— Billy-Bob Gautama

A student approached Billy-Bob Gautama and said, “Goat, did you ever think about getting married?”  “Thought about it,” said Billy-Bob.  “Well,” said the student, “how come you didn’t do it?”  “It’s like this,” said Billy-Bob.  “The first woman I thought about marrying was pretty as a prairie sunset, but turned out she was meaner than a snake.  Next woman I thought about was kind and gentle, but we never had anything to talk about.  Next woman was someone I could talk to all day, but she had no sense of humor.  Then, in Bastrop, I met a woman who was funny, smart, pretty, good to talk to, and sweet as the summer is hot.  Yessir, she was the perfect woman.”  “So,” said the student.  “Why didn’t you marry her?”  “Well,” said Billy-Bob, “turned out she was looking for the perfect man.”