The Dream Café

Steven Brust: “A masterful storyteller of contagious glee and self-deprecating badassery” —Skyler White

New Song with Apologies to Warren Zevon

| 23 Comments

 

Captain hanging out small

(The original can be found here.)

He found a piece of lint on the end of the broom
Excitable cat they all said
And he chased it and he swatted it all over the room
Excitable cat they all said
Well he’s just an excitable cat.

He ate all his catnip, then asked for more.
Excitable cat they all said
And knocked all my glassware onto the floor
Excitable cat they all said
Well he’s just an excitable cat.

He snuck into the room just when I went to bed
Excitable cat they all said
And he did a paso doble on top of my head
Excitable cat they all said
Well he’s just an excitable cat.

He stared at the door like he was stalking a mouse
Excitable cat they all said
When I opened it he chased the dog out of the house
Excitable cat they all said
Well he’s just an excitable cat.

skzb

Author: skzb

I play the drum.

23 Comments

  1. Meow-owww! Pet cat of Minneapolis. Meooow-ooow!

  2. skzb

    Hee hee. That one will have to be all you.

  3. Thanks. There is a full version which answers everyone’s questions. The most recent issue of the NYRB (Jan 14, 2016) is basically an elaborate literary in-joke. I think it’s over now that all questions have been answered and all that remains is for people to make up their minds. But not even I’ve read everything.

  4. Also, I know PR knows too.

  5. skzb

    Jilin: Um. This doesn’t appear to have any connection to the song. What are you referring to?

  6. What I’m hearing is that you want this conversation to end. But if you would like it to continue, it can. I’ve produced evidence on my Facebook page to clear me of most wrongdoing, and I thought that was the end of it. I can’t believe I’m trying to clear my name on the public blog of one of my favorite SF writers. I’m not going to say anything more unless you choose to contact me. A truth that’s told with bad intent beats all the lies you can invent.

  7. skzb

    Jilin, I am very, very confused. I do not know what this conversation is about, or what you are clearing your name about, or who said what to whom about what. Can you send me a link? I’m pretty sure that whatever it is, it has nothing to do with this blog post, the one with the song lyrics, right?

  8. There is no link that has been made publicly available. I’m sorry, I’ve been through a lot recently. If you really don’t understand, chalk this up to intense paranoia. My apologies for disturbing you.

  9. skzb

    No problem, and I’m sorry you’ve been through a lot.

  10. *applause*

  11. Well, I went home with the Box-cleaner
    The way I always do
    How was I to know
    He blogged about the Russians, too

    I was napping in the chair
    I took a little risk
    Send catnip, treats and mice
    Steve, get me out of this

    I’m the innocent bystander
    Somehow I got stuck
    Between the dog and the parrot
    And I’m down on my luck
    And I’m down on my luck
    And I’m down on my luck

    Now I’m hiding in the couch
    I’m a desperate cat
    Send catnip, treats and mice
    The fit has hit the shan

  12. That song sounds familiar.

  13. (The original can be found here.)

  14. Nice one, Steve!

  15. I KNEW it was going to be “Excitable Boy”! Because cat. Love it.

  16. I don’t want to derail the discussion from songs or Warren Zevon, but there is one point I would like to clarify. The content editors of the NYRB helped me a great deal in all this, and they were, so to speak, “on my side.” There was some basic miscommunication I was attempting to negotiate when I first posted in here, on just what the song was about, and now that we find ourselves no longer discussing the same thing, we don’t need to say anything more on the topic. I tend to see other’s good intentions when they might not be there, and although it’s among my many faults, it’s not something I would like to correct.

  17. The cat was a warrior from the land of the short-furred ones
    With broomstick lint for hire, swatting to be done
    The deal was made with humans on an otherwise normal day
    So he set out for the study to join the dusty fray

    Through fifteen and sixteen they fought the gaudio vacuum war
    With their paws on the glassware, knee deep in gore
    For days they chased the dog they thought had fleas
    They killed to earn their living and to help an ape eat sauce covered cheese

    Roll on the catnip pouncer
    Roll on the catnip pouncer

  18. Steve Halter, you have done an excellent thing up there.

  19. Well he came down the staircase, mouth full of mouse
    Excitable tom, they all said
    We found scattered pieces all over the house
    Excitable tom, they all said

    He tested his claws on the Grandfather Clock
    Excitable tom, they all said
    Then he took on the bulldog from just down the block
    Excitable tom, they all said
    Well, he’s just an excitable tom

    Late at night we’d hear him out on the prowl
    Excitable tom, they all said
    Enticing the ladies with a feline yowl
    Excitable tom, they all said
    Well, he’s just an excitable tom

    Then his mistress passed, you know his heart was broke
    Excitable tom, they all said
    So he took a nap from which he never woke
    Excitable tom, they all said
    Well, he’s just an excitable tom

  20. Nice, PrivateIron and Kevin O’Neill.

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