One day, Billy-Bob Gautama drove down to The Roundup Bar and Grille and said to the bartender, “Russ, I want ten shots of Jim Beam. Line ’em up!” The bartender (whose name was Orin) poured out ten shots of Jim Beam in a neat line, and Billy-Bob began to slam them. He got seven of them down before the bartender said, “Now, if you’re going to drink ’em like that, Goat, I’m going to have to cut you off.” Billy-Bob said, “You’d drink ’em like this too if you had what I have.” “Why, what do you have?” said the bartender. Billy-Bob thought for a moment, then said, “Uh, about eighty-five cents.” Thus the bartender was Enlightened.
Texas Wisdom #4
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If you have such contempt for Texans, why do you stay in Texas? Why don’t you move to, oh, say, Massachusetts, where there are a lot of people who feel the same way you do?
1. This one was pretty funny.
2. It’s Massachusetts who elected Mitt Romney governor, you know. Apparently he was too conservative for Utah to cope with. There’s just nowhere safe for liberals anymore. Except possibly the White House. Of course skzb is not a liberal, so he might as well be in Austin as in Cambridge; both are equally far from being communist.
Tim of Angle, where’s the contempt?
Does making Irishmen jokes make you contempt of Irishmen?
Does poking fun at your best friend make you contemptuous of him?
I like an opportunistic Alcoholic, he’s thinking of ways to kill the pain of…thinking.
What contempt for Texans? Texas is just the stage for these jokes. They could be anywhere. There was a time in this country when Irish were considered lazy. It wasn’t generally true, so the belief died; I’m not holding a grudge. Move on…