I was reminded of this by a recent discussion on John Scalzi’s blog.
Some years ago, my friend Caliann, a Texas girl, dated a nice gentleman from California. He picked her up for a date. He walked around to the driver’s door of his car, while she waited by the passenger door.
“What are you doing?” he said.
“Waiting for you to open the door for me.”
“Oh,” he said. “I’m from California. We don’t do that.”
She stood with her arms folded and said in her sweetest southern accent, “Don’t plan on getting laid in Texas, do you?”
Hah! So the next line should be:
“I guess not,” he said, and left her standing on the curb.
I used to race a woman to open car doors. She was adamant at all times that I already did more than enough for her.
She only rescinded when someone came down on the idea by suggesting that it was wrong for a woman to let a man open a car door for her. We tried to arrange this deliberately for his viewing pleasure with an unstated stuck-out tongue, but, alas, it was not to be.
Still, I got a free chance to do something nice for her without having to fight for it for once.
Nicely done.
I always open doors for women. And building doors for anyone if I get to it first. Interestingly, in a lot of central European cultures a man is expected to open a building door and go in first- to make sure it is safe for the woman to follow.
It seems like you’re trying to spark a debate about reverse sexism.
Chris F: I’m not, actually. I just thought it was a funny story. I don’t think there’s much of a lesson there in any direction.
Great story, and nice highlight on cultures colliding.
I open doors out of courtesy for anyone, regardless of gender or any other characteristic, but when women are loud about how men should open doors for them, I ask them if they want chivalry or equality – pick one.
not funny…hilarious. I actually LOLed
Brian, there are almost always more than two options. You may treat people well without expecting them to accept some degree of inferiority in return.
Uh, if you’re an Ayn Rand fan, please ignore this comment.
I will add, for the edification of those who can’t simply find a story funny, that he DID come around and open the door for me, and for the many years after that, he never *failed* to open the door for me, often with a smile and a wink, along with the words, “I might want to get lucky tonight.”
When, some time later, we were in California visiting his family, his father, a most observant and kind gentleman, opened the door for me and I smiled as I said, “I am so glad to see that I was misinformed, and that gentlemen from California do, indeed, open doors for ladies.”
He replied, “Indeed we do. What cad attempted to pass that one off on you?”
I smiled and said nothing more.