The Dream Café

Steven Brust: “A masterful storyteller of contagious glee and self-deprecating badassery” —Skyler White

Another Post that is NOT MY FAULT


Introductory note from Jen, who isn’t sure why she’s cleaning up this post and embedding tweets for skzb when he’s doing something like this to us: I DID NOT make him do this. I went OUT OF MY WAY to keep him from seeing this song idea. I want to blame Elizabeth Bear for saying it in the first place and Kelly Hills for making him see it, but let’s be honest with ourselves: THIS IS TOTALLY STEVE’S VERY OWN FAULT.


Introduction: (Stately)

If it’s gamergating assholes who really piss you off,
Or self rightous SJWs who make you choke and cough,
Or the half-wits being witty ’cause they feel the need to type,
Or the bot accounts spamming you to buy into their hype,
Social media is made to make annoyance and frustration,
Our only choice is bring it all to final termination.



Let’s all ooze germs on the internet!
Bring virtual viruses to life,
So whatever tweet you make,
Will bring out each pain and ache,
And a throat that feels it’s cut with a knife.
And a throat that feels it’s cut with a knife.

Let’s all ooze germs on the internet!
So all would rather die than post.
So the cutsie kitty pics,
And snark about our favorite flicks,
At last will all give up the ghost,
At last will all give up the ghost.

Let’s all ooze germs on the internet!
Let them read our posts in hell.
So whether him or me or you,
We all will gag and spew,
Make it toxic literally as well.
Make it toxic literally as well.


Author: skzb

I play the drum.


  1. This is still not a proper theme song for #travelingjen.

  2. So when are you posting the sheet music so we can all at least try to be on key?

  3. Ditto to Charles. Got a tune for it?

  4. I’m sorry, Jenphalian, but I really like it!

    However I feel that, overall, skzb has lost points for failing to include ‘bacteria’; it rhymes so nicely with hysteria, and we’ve certainly seen enough of that to justify another verse…

  5. He also refused my request for a vaccination verse.

    He does have a tune. Perhaps he will torture the attendees of the next con he attends with it. Perhaps a video could be made.

  6. skzb

    I think someone else could come up with a better tune. I leave it open for them’s that want to. Also, feel free to add verses.

  7. This isn’t quite right, but you could probably adapt it.

    Or adapt your lyrics some. Or both.

  8. I get the subtext. It’s actually about ethics in spreading infections, isn’t it?

  9. skzb

    Can’t get one past you, can I?

  10. Not one, no….

  11. Am in hospital. Definitely need new verse now the truth has been uncovered…

  12. skzb

    Oh, sorry to hear that. 🙁 Hope you’re better soon.

  13. Me too, and thank you.

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